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Old 07-02-2009, 12:57 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Location: Las Vegas NV
Nightlife-Goodlife Investor Invitation

This authentic innovation is an indispensable amenity poised to revolutionize the recession proof global liquor industry, including phenomenal potential for Asian market.

From on premise nightclub & bar to retail, product has completed R&D and market testing and is ready for launch via groundbreaking 'reality' DRTV infomercial, upscale event marketing, and online viral.

Strong viral > rapid critical mass > tipping point. Has the potential to create a social phenomenon akin to Viagra or Red Bull.

Seeking up to $200k via current PPM = approx. 7% of the company. Min. subscription: $1k.

Send a message with a brief outline of your accreditation to receive online access to offering materials.
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Old 07-02-2009, 02:24 PM   #2 (permalink)
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This is a form letter meant to help you improve your post and thereby improve your response. Please keep in mind that many posts, probably just like this one come through here every day asking for money or business partners. This quick form is for others to fill in and is meant to allow people to identify areas that posts commonly lack. This form is meant mostly to point out the flaws in the post, not to award credit for what is done right. Please don't take it personally.

How to read this:
  • [ ] This is not a box I think applies to you
  • [x] This is something that I think applies to you.



I think your idea...
  • [ ] Is good
  • [ ] Is bad
  • [x] Not well articulated
  • [x] Is to generic, you need more of a niche market
  • [ ] Has been done and hasn't succeeded (Please see post description section)
  • [ ] Has been done and worked, so expect competition
Ideas come and go, and do not let anyone discourage you from continuing your idea despite what it said here. However if your idea is not received well it would be foolish to not follow up (civilly please) and ask for suggestions.




I think this post..
  • [ ] IS YELLING AT ME.
  • [x] Lacks significant detail
  • [x] Is not selling your idea well
  • [x] Is not selling you, as a business partner well
  • [ ] Is hard to read (spelling errors, grammar, l33t speak)
  • [x] Is asking for a lot of money
  • [x] Smells like a Nigerian scam
  • [ ] Doesn't specific if your looking for VC, Partner, equity partner
These items are discussed more in a later section. If they are just a quick check box for your reading convenience. Keep in mind everyone who comes through this forum thinks their idea is the next million dollar idea. It may be but you will need to convince the readers.




I think your business proposition...
  • [x] Is missing a business plan
  • [ ] Is missing market research (and a plan to do so)
  • [ ] Is making outrageous claims
  • [ ] Is making claims that violate the laws of physics/nature/chemistry/common sense (its been done before)
You need to have a good description of your business in your post. People are more likely to PM you if you have details to let them know your

idea is something they would be interested in. Oh and make sure what your claiming is possible because being called out on such a blatant error is embarrassing.




I think this post's comments with regards to you....
  • [x] Are non-existent
  • [x] Provides no past business experience
  • [x] Provides no past niche experience
  • [x] Provides no indication of being able to meet in real life (mostly important if your asking for large sums of money)
  • [x] Provides little to no details about your skills.
If your going to attract a partner selling yourself is as important as selling your idea. Why can we trust you? What do you bring to the table?


Extra Comments:
You want a total of $200k and you use a LOT of buz. Try rewriting your post with a more professional, not such an MLM, sounding proposal.
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