Is it OK to point out when someone is lying?

**vietnam** · 05-02-2011 08:39 PM

I'm a very logical person and can quickly identify fallacies and lies. But I am also polite so in my personal life I try not to create conflicts and ignore when people say wrong things. Is it OK in the business world to point out lies? Today I had a meeting with a salesman and he bashed his competitors (wrongly) and sold his service as perfect. I stood silent so he kept pushing more and more lies unto me. Would it be rude to interrupt him every 30 seconds correcting his speech? On one hand it looks rude but on the other by accepting his bs silently I lose bargaining power.
Also should I think exclusively on my company interest or also try to concede and try to make a win-win situation?

**PhillM** · 05-02-2011 10:02 PM

Depends on the attitude you want to portray and what kind of company you run. If you ran Affliction Clothing calling out his bullshit would accurately portray the brands attitude. If you're not a company like that just listen in, tell him you'll think about the offer and never contact him again.

**vietnam** · 05-02-2011 10:16 PM

This only applies when I'm interested in their services but don't want to lose bargaining power by subscribing every lie he says. If it is a salesman of something I'm not interested I won't even waste time listening to. My question is should I be polite or should I be true (even if it means blunt/rude)

**vietnam** · 05-02-2011 10:21 PM

My company and industry attitude is straightforward so with a client or a supplier I would point out errors as they come. But today I had this meeting with a logistics company guy (which is a traditional industry) who was 30 years older than me, trying to bs me so I pointed out some innacuracies, but in a very polite way. I think I should just point out because it's acceptable to defend my interests and fairness but I don't want to come across as anal

**PhillM** · 05-02-2011 10:53 PM

That's kind of tough to answer. It really varies from situation to situation as well as person to person. I would go with being polite, be it pointing something out or ignoring it, for most situations and with the others (the situations that were down right offensive) I would be a little less polite. I don't think you should allow a salesman to walk all over you if they're being completely ridiculous.

**mtnjkwe** · 05-03-2011 03:09 AM

I will go with pointing it out, but in a polite manner. What I have learned is, when the opposite knows, you know, they'll be less likely to want to screw you up. And this will give you an upper hand.

**JustInnovate** · 05-03-2011 11:52 PM

ehh, ide keep quiet. just think about it..you know hes lieng and hes a schmuck. let him think hes getting away with it while you see right through it. keep it in the bag for a rainy day.

**jawzishere** · 05-04-2011 12:31 AM

Nope, there's nothing wrong with calling out a sales person who is lying to you, you just have to do it with tact. Doing it tactfully will put him on his heals and give you more power in the discussion.

I'm no expert on negotiation but one of the most intelligent, mature and tactful ways to question information people are presenting to you is by asking questions.

Ex:
"Interesting, I read somewhere that *insert truth here* Are you sure that's accurate?"
"Oh really? That's weird, a friend of mine works for them and he said *insert truth here*" *Using a little white lie yourself when you're calling out their lie indirectly will likely be impossible for them to catch
"From what I've heard that company *insert truth here*, where did you hear that?"

(There's probably better ways than those examples but that's all I can think of at the moment)

Key points to your responses:
1. Defer your knowledge to some other source besides just you knowing they are wrong. This way YOU are not personally calling them wrong or saying that they are lying, the source you heard from is contesting what they are saying. Important to keep him from feeling your attacking him and then getting defensive/into an argument.

2. By questioning further they have the burden of proof placed upon them to backup what they said, if they can't remember where they heard it you'll likely gain power in the conversation. If they can back it up with someone that seems reasonable than it is just a neutral point because you both heard two different things from two different sources. If he tries to pull out a more ridiculous lie you could keep up the questioning until he says something stupid or trips over his own lies, giving you more power.

Another point to make is that you must still remain open minded. For all you know your knowledge could be flawed to some extent and you may actually learn more correct information if he can back up things with legit sources.

Hope that is helpful.

EDIT: Oh and ALWAYS go for the Win-Win whenever possible. It will get you much further in life and business.